Amber's story

  I was 13 when i found out i was pregnant. I was scared and alone , the worse part was that there were two possibilites of who the father was. I had only been sexually active for about a month when i got pregnant. Neither one of the guys cared anything about the baby and i was called the harshest names in the book. My best friends suddenly wanted nothing to do with me , i was alone and felt betrayed. Every one told me to have an abortion my dad , my friends , even my counselor. I went to a crisis pregnancy center Whispering Hope , they gave me the information i needed to make an iformed descion and decided that i was going to keep my baby. My mom was the only person who supported me , she had me when she was 17. My pregancy was a difficult one , an emotional rollercoaster not to mention the physical complications. The stares and whispers made worse to the point where i didnt want to go out in public. But i didnt let it stop me , i worked with whispering hope ( the crisis pregnancy center) I spoke at fundraisers for them and i went to the high schools in my area with their abstinence education program. I told my story to the teens my age and expressed how having premarital sex affected my life in a huge way. I also helped start a teen mom and mom to be support group with the help of another teen mom and the center.

When i was 8 months pregnant i was watching a movie with my little brother when all of a sudden i felt like i was peeing on myself and i couldnt stop. I stood up and saw the immediate terror on my younger brothers face , i looked down and i was gushing bright red blood. I made my way to the bathroom to find a towel , blood dripping along the way. I called my mom she told me to lay there until the paramedics arrived. I layed down on the bathroom floor and started to cry. I was so scared i had often questioned why me? Why did i have to get pregnant i was only 13, but at that moment all i could do was pray for my babys safety. I remember that i called Joe (my ex boyfriend and the possivle father) I didnt know what else to do , i just needed something to calm me down and i needed someone to care. He told me to let him know if i was in labor and to call him back. I guess i thought that if he knew what was happedning thenm maybe he would care and be there for me. I was so scared , all i wanted was for my baby to be ok , then he kicked and i knew that he ws still alive and that there was hope. We called 911 and an ambulence came and took me to the hospital . I was scared my mother was working so i was alone until she arrived at the hospital. The paramedic said that he thought it was just my water and i would be ok since the bleeding stopped But i knew that wasnt it this was bright red blood not amniotic fluid. At the hospital the doctors checked me and said that my cervix was completly closed and they didnt know 100% what caused my bleeding but that it had stopped and the baby and i would be fine. That was the scariest day of my life.

However the best day of my life was December 28th. The day my son was born. On the 27th i went to the hospital to be induced . My due date was the 28th and my cervix was still ripe ( i was not even close to having a babythe cervix has to be "green" before it can begin to dialate and open) So on the 27 my mom and my aunt and uncle went to applebees for what i joked and called "my last meal" . I was to nervouse to eat anything though..... I arrived at the hosptial and they drew blood , hooked me up to the monitor and gave me cervidil (sp. to softer my cervix) they put me on morphine for the pain. Needless to say i fell asleep shortly after that and woke up periodically throughout the night for more tests. The next morning they started me on petocin ( to start contactions) and i was in labor. A few hours later my water broke after that the contractions came harder and faster . They were more and more painful. I remeber seeing all those movies where women who were in labor cussed and yelled so i tried my hardest to be as nice as i could to everyone . I didnt want to hurt anyones feelings. My family was there , my mother was probly just as scared as i was. I was holding it together and feeling pretty strong. When your in that situation your thinking " ok this is what i have to do so lets do it and get it over with , theres no turning back " and you just do it , you have to , there is no point in freaking out it would just make it worse. My mom and the nurse could tell that i was in alot of pain so we asked for someting to take the edge off . They said they could go ahead and give me my epidural. I remember it feeling like a sharp wasp sting only worse..... But not to long after that it kicked in and the pain pretty much went away. Not to long after that Justin and whitney arrived ( evans biological dad and aunt) . I wasnt in any pain i was just scared and kind of out of it from all the meds. I remember how weird it was , whitney who used to be my good friend was there while i was in labor , but she was talking to me as if we were still in school just having a normal conversation , i guess she couldnt really relate to what i was going through. Her grandmother was filming the whole time. I got everyone to leave the room for a min so i could talkto justin alone . At the time he was my " boyfriend" and possibly evans father and he always acted different when others were around so i asked to talk to him alone. He was scared he didnt know what to say to me, i just wanted him to hold me and comfort me but he couldnt. I kept telling him that i was ok and wasnt in any pain , he just kept saying that he was sorry , and that it was his fault i was going through this. Not long after that the doctor told me that evan was trying to come out face first. And that i was going to have to have a c-section. His neck was bending and it could break if i tried to have him vaginally not to metion the fact that he was stuck. Yes stuck , His head was stuck in between my pelvic bones, he had too big a head and i had too little a body. My whole pregnany i had been terrified of having a c-section and that was my worst fear and it was about to come true weather i liked it or not. There was only one person allowed to go in the room with me and that was my mom. I remember feeling thirsty , my throat was sooo dry and i was begging for an ice chip. They would nt let me eat anything or drink anything. So iwas starving and dying of thirst. The gave me a very high dose through my epidural line . They pumped me so full of drugs that i was literally shaking uncontrolably. They strapped my arms down to the table , it was like i was beign crucified , in the shape of a cross. They started the procedure , it didnt take long , the whole time i was just waiting to hear a baby cry , it was the longest wait ever. I felt and enormous amount of pressure on my chest i couldnt breathe. I t wasnt what i expected , i expected to feel pressure on my stomach but i felt like i was about to throw up the entire time and almost did. But it felt like there was an elephant sitting on my chest . The whole operating table was literally rocking back and forth fro the doctor tugging hard trying to get evan out. He was stuck pretty bad.

Then i saw them carry my baby over to a table to clean him off. He was bruised and cut from being stuck , his forehead was badly swollen and he looked like he had been beat up. I waited but still i didnt hear him cry , it took them a few mins to get him to cry. It almost seemed like it took longer to sew me up than it did to get him out. All i wanted to do was hold him and see what he looked like after 9 months of waiting. He was born at 5:45 pm , i had been in labor a whole day.....but it was worth it We got a paternity test and know who Evans father is , Justin is evans father. He was also only 14 when our son was born. We actually got two DNA tests done b/c the first one his grandmother didnt believe . She told me that evan wasnt justins becasue God sent her a dream, and told her that he wasnt. The test didnt change much , hes still not around and hes in and out of rehab or juvie. Maybe one day he will grow up or at least i hope so.

But I met the man who is now my husband when evan was 4months old. He loves my son just as if he were his own.

I am now 5 months pregnant with our little girl ! I will be 16 with two kids and its hard and scary but i know i can do it. Since this pregnancy i have been very prolife , before i found out i was preg. i witnessed my then best friend go through and abortion , i witnessed how it changed who she was and how it affected her deeply. So i try to do my best in helping young girls not to choose abortion. By telling them my story and that i did it and they can do it too. It is hard , the hardest part for me is theloss of my childhood. I got pregnant in the 8th grade , i never really got the chance to be a teenager. I will never get to go to prom i will never get to be a kid and live that fun filled carefree teenage life that people call "the best years of thier lives" I have a motto for my 8th grade school year "being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up , these are the best days of our lives. And the only thing that matters is just following your heart and eventually youll finally get it right" Its a song i used to listen to by the ataris. Its hard , and it hurts seeing all my old friends and who they are now and how much fun they are having being crazy kids. But i woulndt change a thing. I am pregnant again and i am filled with the same doubts and fears as i ws the first time , only this time im more scared because i know exactly whats going to happen adn what im about to go through. But all you can do is move foward and try , and thats what im doing i am trying to be the best mother and wife i can be. I wish people would see me for all that i have done and all that i am trying to do .Instead of seeing me as a 16 yearold mother of two , i wish they would veiw me as a16 year old mother whos in college and trying to do the best that she can for herself and her family and trying to help as many people as she can along the way. I want to share my story with other young girls and mothers. To let them know that they can do it , not to let the sterotypes of teen moms get to you , do your best to proove them wrong. My son saved my life , i was going down a bad path and i know that i would not already be in college and i would not be where i am today if it were not for me getting pregnant at 13. I want young girls to know that your pregnancy doesnt have to be a bad thing and it wont ruin your life , it saved mine and gave me the will and the motivation to make something out of myself.

Update : Amber had baby Lexie on May 3rd 2007.They are both doing great . You can see Amber and pictures of her children throughout this site.

If you would like to contact Amber for advice Contact us.

                                              Jessica's Story

Hi my name is Jess, I'm 18 years old and almost 6 months pregnant. Well my pregnancy started with a one night stand. The father doesn't want anything to do with me or my son because he doesn't want his girlfriend to find out he was cheating on her. Now I am just taking things as they come and I am helped out a lot by of support from my family and friends especially my parents. I hope that every teen mom is able to talk to their parents and get the support they need. Even though my parents were extremely mad at first they eased into it and now they are so excited and can't wait for the baby to come.


my myspace url : myspace.com/goosez1989

my email: goosez1989@gmail.com
I'd be more than happy to talk to anyone who needs advice or just needs to talk. Also my aim sn is goosez1989 
                                                     

                      Christina's story

I was 15 and a sophmore in high school when I got pregnant. I am still with the babys father by the way. In all honesty I was the last person anyone in my school thought would become pregnant - there were other girls pregnant at the time and I was the shocker. I didnt tell my parents for 6 months and by then I was pretty big but tried to cover it up with sweatshirts and big clothes. I was taking care of myself though as I had gotten prenatals from the drug store. When my mother found out she was okay with it which really surprised me, my dad was furious though. The day after they found out I went for my first ultrasound which made everything real. My best friend kept asking me if it was a boy or girl which the didnt tell me, so I scheduled a time to go back to find out. My mother went in with me this time, last time I went in alone, and we found out it was a GIRL. I called my fiancee as soon as I was out of there but his cell phone was off because he was still in school. He was so happy when he got the message. I stayed in school since I wasnt due until august. It was hard because so many people were so terrible to me, some tried to hit me in the stomache for me to miscarry,mostly those girls who like my fiancee and wanted him to leave me. People talked all the time even saying that the baby wasnt his, which in the state of PA it is mandatory for unwed mothers to give the father a paternity test at the hospital before they put their name of the birth certificate. So by the end of the year I was the only person allowed to wear tank tops and shirts that didnt cover too much of my arms, I even went to our field day and got a huge bucket of water dumped on my head by our principal. My mother wanted me to give my daughter up for adoption but I couldnt do that, I was adopted also. Im so happy that I didnt, but I did agree to meet with a couple and talk with them, the day I was supposed to was the day I had my daughter so I never went. She was born on August 1,2006. My fiancee and I are very happy with everything, shes getting bigger but he is missing most of it now since he is now in the Navy. We will be getting married on June 27,2008 and our little girl will be our flower girl. Were hoping that we will be pregnant by the end of 2008. Wish us luck! Thanks for reading it all. Good luck with all of your pregnancies and you can do it. Dont let anyone tell you that you cant.